July 2011
38 posts
A sign on the window of this pub
We now have sky sports. And we need you to come and watch stuff on our big screens so that we can keep Rupert Murdoch (international brigand, to be polite) in the state to which we have allowed him to become accustomed
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Harry Potter 9 - Least fave male character
Tricky. I never liked that Yaxley guy. I remember him appearing randomly in the first chapter of the last book and I got confused, because I thought I was meant to know who he was. We learn nothing about him and he plays the role of ‘generic bad guy’, but he’s got no depth, no history and I feel short-changed that we didn’t get more of established baddies or Snape, instead.
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Why Twilight is one massive satire piece →
Harry Potter 8 - What do you think would be your...
It’s got to be Charms, hasn’t it? That’s where you get the real foundation of magic. You get to do all the crazy shit that isn’t limited to changing things into other things, or defending yourself against evil. In Charms, you can do it all - make things fly, explode, glow - anything. Personally, I’d give myself a killer rack.
But that’s me.
“Its a good day to bury bad news.”
– My dad, on all the furore over Winehouse death.
Holy shit that’s a dark double entendre
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Harry Potter 7 - Fave female character and why?
Luna Lovegood is a strange one. She’s completely credulous, which I don’t tend to like in people; but also, she’s so straight down the line. She accepts shit. When spooky, weird, crazy stuff is going on, she shrugs and gets the fuck on with it. Who can’t help but admire that.
Molly Weasley is pretty great. I’m pretty sure she was written as a powerful witch whose...
Harry Potter 6 - What house would you want to be...
Part of me wants to say Ravenclaw cos, you know, they’d prob be reading books all day and learning all the ‘smarts’, which is what I like. I think I’d probably be sorted into Ravenclaw.
Having said that, I’m a bit of an outsider, a bit quite and introvert, so I wonder if I’d be happy in Hufflepuff. They seem to do OK, bumbling along by themselves, just like me....
Spambots are my friends
So I got a spambot thing trying to direct me to articlelink13 (dot) com. So, I did what I normally do and googled “articlelink13” and found that most people get a snarky spambot saying things like, ‘make money now, you dumbass, at articlelink13 (dot) com.”
But me? I just got a nice PM inviting me to articlelink13 if I wished.
Why is it sucking up to me over others?
Unisex toilets
In my office, the nearest loos are unisex and contain one man’s cubicle, one woman’s cubicle and one free-for-all cubicle. All three cubicles are exactly the same, including that the men’s cubicle contains a sanitary bin. This is why I use the woman’s cubicle if the other two are occupied.
No shame about it.
Harry Potter 5 - Fave male character and why
Snape comes a close second, but I’ve always been a Voldemort fan. In a way, he’s a bit of a generic villain type, but I like that he also represents the folly of dictators, the fear that generates evil, the danger of insecurity and the horror of narcissism. It’s strange that he became a generic villain type due to his many complexities in his younger years that stripped away his...
Harry Potter 4 - Least fave female character and...
I never really liked Fleur Delacour. She was a pretty useless competitor in the Triwizard Tournament and I thought she should have been a better representative as the only girl in the games. She didn’t have much personality and seemed to be a bad mashup of French and female stereotyping, which was disappointing.
When she reappeared later in the series, she still lacked any real substance...
Harry Potter 3 - Is there any of the films...
At first I didn’t like that they left out all the stuff about Harry’s parents’ and friends’ past because it added a richness to the books. But looking back, it wasn’t that necessary to make the films work on their own. JK Rowling added so much detail to the peripheral characters and their histories that they all felt important at the time, but I think the film makers...
Harry Potter 2 - Your Favourite Movie
Man, I kind of want to say The Prisoner of Azkaban. It was such a beautiful film and I love Alfonso Cuaron so much but… I’m going to say The Goblet of Fire.
Azkaban was a little too disjointed for me, as wonderful as it was. Goblet of Fire was one of my favourite of the books and it had a great performance from Brendon Gleeson who had a rare moment of replacing my mental character of...
Harry Potter 1 - Favourite Book
The Order of the Phoenix
This book had me from the word go - an exciting opening, a constant level of danger and a suffocating pressure of governmental paranoia. Based on Neville Chamberlain’s utter, fearful delusion about the growing danger of the Nazi party, the wizarding ministry brings its might upon Hogwarts through the terrifyingly quaint, Delores Umbridge and by its consistent...
The 30 Day Harry Potter Challenge
porky2468:
Just because I’m going to be Harry Potter obsessed for a while. Or at least, more than I am normally… Read More
Fucking hell it's harry potter tomorrow!
Fffffuuuuuucccck
Question: In your own life when did you have to put your own bravery to the test?
Emma: I feel like young girls are told, I don't know, that they have to be this kind of princess and fragile. It's bullshit. You've got to be.. I identify much more with being a warrior, a fighter. If I was going to be a princess I'd be a warrior princess definitely. There's nothing wrong with being afraid. It's not the absence of fear, it's overcoming it. Sometimes you've got to blast through and have faith. While filming Perks of Being A Wallflower.. I was terrified. I was so nervous. New crew, new location, new cast. There's a scene where I have to mimic Susan Saradon and I have to do this dance in front of extras and I felt ridiculous. I'm constantly doing things that are new, and that takes bravery I guess. Have faith in yourself, believe in yourself, and it'll all hopefully work out.
Antijokes
Your friend is so gay, he has consensual sex with other men. and enjoys it.
What’s worse than finding a worm in your apple?
The Holocaust.
Knock knock.
Who’s there?
To.
To who?
To whom.
Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have a gun. Get in the van.
What’s sad about 4 black people in a Cadillac going over a cliff?
They were my friends.
...
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Look Up
If you take a 0.6 mile (1km) square around you, and look upwards, there are typically three billion insects in that column of air including butterflies at 3,000 feet, aphids, wasps and ladybirds at 6,000 feet and, even higher than them, gipsy moths looking for mates. Higher still, at 13,000 feet, are spiders flying on little strips of silk.
Source:...
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